Maneuvering Life Transitions
As spring approaches, it’s natural to think about change. Life is all about transition. From a weekend to a weekday, and one season to the next; or bigger milestones such as changes in your living situation, schooling, job, relationships, or life stages – transitions are inevitable.
Clients often tell me that they don’t handle change well. There are a wide range of emotions involved with transitions: fear, anxiety, excitement, sadness, relief, loneliness, stress, joy. When facing something BIG, or more than one transition, it’s important to honor those moments by stopping and adjusting, before plowing blindly forward.
Unfortunately, many people get stuck in feeling overwhelmed and consequently beat up on themselves for not being up to the task. This turns into ‘checking out’, or spiraling down into a dark place that can feel paralyzing and too challenging to overcome. That inner critic may be fully present and yelling at you… but it is not who you are as a whole. You are not your fear and worries.
FACE THE INEVITABLE
Don’t waste time trying to stop change. Very little in life is permanent.
You are not alone. Others have been through similar and survived. You can too.
There is no clear path. Transitions are not linear. They bob and weave and loop around. Hang on and brace for the curves.
Learn from others. Reach out and gather information, tips and hints to getting through this.
Pay attention to your perspective. Transitions can help get us unstuck, move forward, gain insight, and open up new opportunities. They’re not all negative.
Remember your past successful transitions. You’ve survived other difficult moments; perhaps even grown from them.
Recognize the benefits. What new opportunity, freedom, prospect or relief comes with the transition?
Anticipate and prepare. Be ready to resolve issues as they arise. Sometimes it’s as simple as acknowledging that there will be obstacles, so that you aren’t surprised.
Acknowledge coinciding emotions. When they surface, “say hello” and validate how you feel.
Break it down into smaller steps. How can you make this more approachable?
Be curious. Explore the possibilities, and allow yourself to be inspired. What could this look like?
Celebrate each positive step you take. You’re doing it!
Lean on your supports – friends, family, therapist, pastor, online communities, etc.
While transitions may not always be expected, you can choose how to respond. Choose to accept the challenge, and even embrace what comes next.