When Someone is Constantly Critical
It can be difficult to deal with someone who consistently finds ways to put you down or criticize you. If you have experience with someone like this, you know how frustrating it can be. However, fighting back, or staying silent is rarely productive, so what can you do? Remind yourself that often, they aren’t trying to attack you, but rather they are looking for an outlet for their anger and frustration. Try to facilitate calmer discussions with this person, and see if you can find the real issue at the heart of their comments. At the end of the day, it is their negativity, not yours. Be the positive change you want to see, and try to help the negative.
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When Others' Input Matters
The cycle of external validation is something we might all be familiar with. Getting praise from someone or receiving a compliment isn’t a bad thing, but if your self-worth becomes too associated with other people’s input, it can be a difficult mindset to overcome. Your self-image is best based on your preferences, and it’s important to develop a sense of yourself from the inside out, and not the other way around. By showing yourself love and appreciation, you can balance internal and external validation, and create a path to the person you want to be.
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Maneuvering Life Transitions
Humans are creatures of comfort, and we prefer to feel as comfortable as we can. However, one of the only constants in life is change, and every day will always present new opportunities and challenges. Navigating these two realities can be difficult, but it doesn’t need to be! Instead of focusing on remaining comfortable, try to find comfort in change. It can open you up to new challenges and opportunities, and through this process, you can grow into a greater understanding of yourself. Change may be difficult, but when you take control and choose how you respond to it, change becomes powerful.
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The Risks of Self-Diagnosing
When something feels wrong or “off,” we try to figure it out as soon as we can. While this can be helpful in figuring out some plans of action, or the next steps to take, it can be dangerous to self-diagnose; especially when it comes to mental health. Having a diagnosis can provide comfort, and can help you know more about what you’re dealing with, but it doesn’t fix the problem itself. Self-diagnoses can also form labels and opinions about yourself that might be incorrect or incomplete. It’s ok to do your own research, just make sure you reach out to a professional for help as well.
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Asking For and Receiving Support
It can be surprisingly difficult to ask for help sometimes. Whether it’s for reasons of pride, embarrassment, or self-doubt, many of us hesitate when we need help the most. If you find it difficult to ask for help, that’s ok; it can be hard for all of us. Just remember there are people you trust and people who care about you, who will more than likely be willing to help you. Try to develop a few strategies for reaching out to people, and build a support system for yourself from the people closest to you. It’s not weak or strange to ask for assistance, and if you need it, all you have to do is ask.
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Coping The Best You Can
We’ve all had overwhelming days in our lives. These are the days that drag on and on, and everything seems to pile up, leaving you tired and drained. The good news is that these days are normal, and while they are trying in the moment, they are never permanent. With some practice and support, handling an overwhelming time in your life gets easier, and in some cases, it can help you take a step back from the daily hustle and bustle of life. If you’re feeling that life has become too overwhelming, take a pause and prioritize your mental health. Sometimes life can be too much, and that’s ok; there’s always tomorrow!
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How Well Do You Know Yourself?
We’d all like to think that we know ourselves pretty well. However, if someone asked you to tell them about yourself, what would you say? You might try to explain who you are through your job or your personal history, where you’ve been, and what you’ve done. While these all make up your experience, it fails to explain who YOU are, and what you value and respect in life. Having a deeper awareness of yourself can actually help you in many areas of life. If you put in the time and effort to know yourself and what you value, you might make some breakthroughs on the path to the life you want.
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It's Really Not About You
We’ve all had someone in our life lash out at us at one point or another. It never feels good to be on the receiving end of someone' else’s anger, but more often than not, that anger isn’t a result of your actions. People can get stressed and frustrated for hundreds of reasons, and it’s important to consider that when someone lashes out at you. If someone is being unnecessarily rude or hurtful to you, don’t tolerate or excuse their actions. Take the time to respond appropriately. Sometimes, all you need to do is walk away.
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Teen Dating Abuse Happens
Dating as a teenager can feel thrilling, goofy, awkward, or even truly romantic. However, like all relationships, teen relationships can also be harmful and abusive. Abuse can come in many forms, and sometimes it’s hard to notice the patterns of abuse, especially in young relationships. While not all teen relationships are abusive, it is important to keep an eye out for possible warning signs. If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, be sure to find someone you trust that can provide some help.
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You're Worth It
What makes you valuable? Some people might find their value in their job, appearance, or status in the world, while others find their value in how they compare to peers around them. While these are all valid ways of defining what you do and how you live, they are not good markers of self-worth. Your self worth should come from a place that values all of you for who you are, not what you do. You are a complete, valuable person, flaws and all.
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How To Tell Someone They Hurt You
When someone hurts you, how do you respond? It is a difficult situation to navigate, especially if you want to continue being around the person who hurt you. Whether the distress they caused was intentional or not, make sure they know that their actions have hurt you. While you shouldn’t ignore them or retaliate to hurt them back, you are allowed to feel hurt, and telling the person who hurt you can help both sides understand where the other person is at. This is to start a conversation, not a fight.
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Walls Are Not A Sign of Strength
When we are faced with difficult emotions and feelings, a common response is to throw up our emotional walls. These walls can come in many forms, such as avoiding discussions about your feelings or refusing to cry in front of other people. We often feel like shutting people out when we feel vulnerable, but in reality, opening yourself up to others can be a much healthier option. It can feel scary at first, opening up to the people around you, but allowing yourself to be vulnerable may help you overcome some emotional obstacles, and grow into the person you want to be.
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Are You Coming From Different Places?
Relationships require work from both sides in order to be sustainable. As you progress in a relationship, you will learn new things about your partner, and together you will learn how to communicate with one another. This can allow for both of you to connect on new levels, and can even lead to a stronger, healthier relationship. If that communication falters, however, you could risk losing the relationship. Take time to check in with your partner, and if you feel a slip in your communication, make sure you both work to find a solution.
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What Defines You?
Humans are very complex creatures. We are a vast combination of thoughts, emotions, hopes, and ideals, and yet, when we are asked to define who we are, our responses are often limited. We define ourselves by our jobs, our physical characteristics, or any number of aspects that make us who we are. Each of these definitions fail to represent the true YOU. Instead, try defining your goals and aspirations, or the way you want to live for the next year. Defining yourself can leave you in a box, but you can just as easily break out, by focusing on the life around you.
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Clear Your Head!
2020 brought all of us new challenges and difficulties that we weren’t expecting, and as we move into the new year, you might find it hard to leave the stress and tension of last year behind. If you feel your thoughts and emotions are clouded by lingering stress and tension, try a brain dump to help alleviate some of that tension. A brain dump can be any number of things, from a journal entry to a voice recording. Regardless of the format, a brain dump can help you write down, verbalize, and organize the loose lingering thoughts in your head. Make some time in the next week to try a brain dump of your own; you might find it helpful as we move further into the new year!
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How Are You Holding Up?
Last year was difficult, there’s no question about it. The changes we went through in 2020 forced us to adapt in new ways, and approach our mental health as we had never done before. While it is easy to ask for things to “return to normal,” there are ways this change can help us grow into new people. Start by focusing on just your basic needs such as food, water, shelter, and sleep, and work your way back to the big concerns and stresses of life. Reach out for support, and seek professional help if you feel that it would be useful to you. It will be ok, and we will continue to grow.
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What To Do In The In-Between
The few days before New Years can feel like an “in-between” space; a space that waits in anticipation for what comes next. This can be a source of anxiety for many people, as uncertainty and doubt tend to lead our emotions while we wonder what comes next. It’s ok to wonder at what might be coming in the future, but don’t allow it to consume all of your thoughts. Ground yourself in small, concrete ways, and take stock of what you can and can’t control. The new year can feel daunting, but with the right mindset, it can become a new opportunity to grow and find your path.
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Take Control of Your Holidays
All too often, we feel the pressure to make the holidays “special,” when in reality they can be very stressful for many people. As the year comes to an end, people are dealing with a plethora of stresses and challenges, and the added pressure of the holidays can feel overwhelming. Make sure you take time during this season to prioritize yourself. Your holidays don’t have to meet anyone else’s expectations; only your own. Enjoy the rest and relaxation, and make space for your joy.
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You Can't Change Someone Else
It’s difficult to see the people we care about struggling or making unhealthy decisions. Often, we want to help this person, by taking on the task of “fixing” them, without realizing what this means for both parties. As much as we want to, we can’t change another person, and we certainly can’t “fix” them; they must do that work for themselves. Instead, try to be a good role model, and offer support when you can, without assuming that they need your help. If you can still remain a positive outlet in their life, you are helping them in the best way that you can.
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How Are You Showing Up?
Day to day life occurs differently for everyone. For many people, it can feel as though life is passing them by, or every day feels the same. While some of this feeling comes from the unavoidable obstacles and challenges that happen in life, a lot of these feelings come down to how you approach each day! Start guiding yourself towards the positives in your life. You can choose to let life happen to you, or you can go out and make life happen.
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