What To Do In The In-Between
As we close out 2020 – after enduring months of a global pandemic, political divisiveness, conflicts over racial injustices, and seemingly constant change to our daily lives – it’s the perfect time to recognize the topic of transition in our lives. We are surviving a time in history where so much feels suspended and we hang on the edge of anticipating what comes next. We have a choice in how to move into 2021. Some have fists up ready to fight, others run toward it, and many will hide from what might be.
The end of a chapter is near, and before a new one begins, we must first face the “in-between”. The threshold between our current point in time and the next phase of life. Some call this liminal space; where we are “betwixt and between the familiar and the completely unknown”. For most, this increases anxiety – filled with what-ifs, what do I do, who am I now, and overall doubts about whether you can tolerate or survive the next segment of your life. This middle stage is something we all face in various times of our lives. For every: marriage or divorce, end of a relationship, job loss or promotion, retirement, life-changing illness/injury, move to a new place, death of someone dear, step into adulthood, birth of a child … we steer through the stages of change.
START BY NAVIGATING THE IN-BETWEEN
Acknowledge the discomfort and fear - Identify your losses. What is over and being left behind? What do you choose to keep?
Make space – to be alone, to process, to rest, recharge, and to find openings for new inspiration.
Explore SMALL achievable goals – rewrite a resume, brainstorm new ideas, research resources for support, drink more water, set aside 10 minutes daily to stretch or move, etc.
Regulate your stress – include things in your life that reduce your tension: exercise, cooking, music, reading, snuggling with a pet, meditation, playing.
Engage in what is possible – worry less about what MIGHT go wrong, and focus more on what you can learn. Without pre-judgement or trying to predict, imagine what your life could be.
Trust yourself - recognize what you already know. Allow this knowledge to guide you through the unknowns. Remind yourself that you have gotten through difficult times and uncertain situations in the past. You will be okay.
Connect with others – feedback and encouragement are key. Talk with others who have gotten through similar difficulties, and who can be supportive.
Give yourself permission to be hopeful – no need to dwell on what has gone or might go wrong. Search for opportunities and openings.
Be patient - with yourself, with others, with life. Live with intention. Do not rush to jump to the next phase in life. Feel good about each step you take.
Learn how to show up for yourself and be okay through the fear and discomfort of the in-between. This will help you to set a path for what is next in your life, while feeling confident that you can get through the inevitable unknowns along the way.